Luck, Punished or Just a Man #1

Wednesday 21st August 2013

A Factual Post, Aarrgh!   A different post for me.

Express Yourself ‘Man’  [ part one ]

I was sitting in the solitary darkness of my life, and thinking about this whole blogging world. Recently and over time I have read so many posts from people expressing so much about life, love, universe, trauma, health, God and all things that tugs at one’s emotions. All top quality work may I say, not criticizing. Also how music can be related to our emotions, poetry with humour and powerful heart wrenching words, which I firmly believe.  People respond with all the nice and supportive comments, some even expressing a little of their own and having a conversation. Mostly women, not all.

But this post from my viewpoint a mans, well I think of myself as a man.  There does not seem to be many men out there with all these powerful life stories, expressions of love, or how the universe is treating them what ever, but maybe they just cannot let it out.  Well I use to be like this in fact I still am, so I am stepping out from my comfort zone. Just this once, maybe it might even kill this blog, who knows.  I am not a writer, not as educated  and do not possess the ability and quality to equal the posts I have read, hence I will not be able use the expressive and fancy words, so please just accept for what it is. 

How many people actually practice what they preach, yes I know there are some, but in truth how many others join in to be part of the crowd. Maybe I am one.  

AUK-logoclick me for more info:

I was born very young, and from this very early age I was diagnosed Asthmatic, quite severely, but I knew no different. My youth years I spent struggling and many times being taken to hospital, and nearly died on two occasions. When I was child there were no inhalers, well not yet available for public use, so I use to suck a pill called Neo-Epinine, it was so powerful for me I had to break it into four and suck under the tongue. I do remember my heart rate rising and it felt like my chest might explode. Catch 22, either I suffocate struggling to breathe or risk my heart giving in. Nice choice.

[ Neo-Epinine (Isoprenaline sulphate) tablets, mid 1950s
The drug isoprenaline is a bronchodilator. It was first introduced in 1948 for use with asthma.
Its over-prescription in aerosol form in the 1950s and early 1960s contributed to a rise in
asthma-related mortality. These Neo-Epinine tablets are believed to date from the mid 1950s. ]

info from –

  I am one of 5.4 million in the UK, and not many people know that an average of 3 people per day in UK still die from it. This is today, so you can imagine what the statistics were when I was a child. I missed a lot of schooling and hence my education suffered. One particular teacher realised this and helped me beyond the normal schooling hours, and if it was not for her I would not have gained 7 x GCE’s. So I say a big thank you MRS WINGATE. tears are swelling my eyes at this thought. I did try to partake in the PE lessons [Physical Education] I did two cross country runs and the second time I collapsed, and was taken to the nearby hospital. So no more.

Peak Flow Meter,N3103 and diary. Over the years and even as recent as a few months back I have had to do twice daily peak flow meter tests, usually over a period of a month and record each test (best of thee puffs) and no cheating. I still have my meter from a very long time ago. My mother taught me this. And while I am on the subject of my mother. Well she was a true Angel,[click me] not just because she was my mother and I loved her dearly, but because she was always there, by side and supporting every little moan, each wheeze, and every night when I coughed myself to sleep, only to awake a few hours later. This caused a great deal of tiredness and tension. It made things so awkward if I ever did a sleep overs, which as kids we liked to do, or other times when everyone else is sleeping cozily and here I am trying not to cough, or wheeze to attract attention. Plenty of time to think.

Today I still hide when taking a puff from the inhaler. Even today this is so, I am lucky to get 5 hours sleep. Always tired, I know many of you out there experienced this lack of sleep as well, for different reasons maybe, so you know what I am talking about. Although this is an on going story this is for another day, today is about….well what is it about really? Am I preaching, letting off steam, looking for sympathy or just being informative and letting you my readers, if any do read that is, get to know me a little better. A few posts recently mentioned things like do we really know who is behind the blogs and words, and having the belief and trust a reader has to have. Anyway I am going off the beaten track and do not want to bore you more. There will probably be no reader that gets this far anyway. So I will tell you what, I will break this up into parts so I will do another follow up  post if there is any interest. My battles with life and more recently Diabetes, which is still like a bombshell hitting me.

I would like call any other men and see if they wish to join in on this ‘Express Yourself Man’ so come on and help set up a club. I know this will be hard because I do not have many men followers and probably less who read. Contact me as per normal Thank you.

Part two coming shortly, a day or two. for my own piece of mind,






23 thoughts on “Luck, Punished or Just a Man #1

  1. I had chronic asthma as a child and in the 1960s was always being rushed to hospital for adrenaline injections! Or the oxygen tent. Terrifying and serious disease. I have only had a few serious episodes as an adult. I feel for you and love the style of this post but, unfortunately I’m not a man hehe.

    1. Hello Jules nice to see you,, you can obviously see where I am coming from with this, and am going to do a follow up which you will also relate to I expect, The male thing was a suggestion a long time back by a fellow blogger,, just testing the water.. Thank you so much for your comments and visit,, welcome.. 😉

  2. My husband’s mother died in 1964 from asthma treatment (cortisone) which gave her a heart attack. She was 43. You’ve done better than she did, but I can see from your story above that you’ve never grown out of it. I read it with interest. A great piece of writing!

    1. She sounds like she was the same age my mother who died in ’74’ age 53,, yes there was not a great deal in those days, and maybe being younger helped me, just guessing really,, but those little yellow pills were some powerful drug.. and thank you Trish for your praise.. love to read it, it makes it all worth while thank you. 😉

  3. I did read all of it and it makes me sad. I really do hope things improve and that your next installment will be more uplifting due to progress rather than not. G

    1. Thank you Gemma, It was not as bad as it actually sounds,, over the years and condensed makes it seem so,, but thanks for your thoughts.. just trying to emlighten people… 😉 welcome…

  4. I too suffer from Asthma and I know it’s something that is with you for life (unless some genius out there comes up with some kind of solution). I find my preventative medication works really well for me and only really have an attack these days when I have had a bad bout of hay fever. Sorry to hear you are having so many health issues and I truly hope you feel better soon x

    1. I do still have it, controlled but with age and a new diagnosis it has affected me,, I am okay and well, do have my days..thank you Karen for your award and your kind words.. watch for my next follow up post,, welcome and appreciated..

  5. As a mild sufferer (by comparison) I have every sympathy. I was in trouble every time I caught a cold, and missed a lot of schooling. I can remember lying propped up and throwing a handkerchief rhythmically into the air, which seemed to help the breathing. Mine is still there, but controlled by a nightly puff.

    1. I still carry inhalers, cannot leave it behind when I go out otherwise I become a paranoid. breathless. panicky and have to return to collect it. But if I do not realise I have forgotten it, I will be okay. Strange,, but I cannot live without. thank you 😉

  6. Oh my, you really grabbed me on this one. I have and still suffer with extremely bad asthma. Almost died several times. Missed school. People think I exaggerate about animal dander. shunned a lot-mostly as a kid because I could not be in other kids houses with cats, ride horses, short hair dogs and most unless poodle crossed. Could not do hay rides, etc. No, taking the animal into another room or outside does not work. I have not been able to attend places where there is smoke and avoided people if I see a cigarette. I am thought to be a nob sometimes. My allergies from smoke and allergies will kill me as if someone eating a nut that would kill them from a nut allergy. Just slightly slower. I hate it. The meds cost so much and I have to use them at least twice a day. always have the rescue one with me. I found your blog from the focus challenge. What a wonderful post here from your heart.

    1. You have taken me back, you mentioned some things there that I was going to mention in my follow up post 2 I was lucky with the dog thing and cat,, but maybe it was because I was brought up in the country,, but there were other things like perfumes and scents and flowers etc you know this.. this is a wonderful response,, please return,,, tthank you and welcome and so appreciated. 😉

  7. You may not have been trained as a writer, Gerry, but you are a writer. This was beautiful. It was from the heart and spoke to mine. What more could any writer want from his or her work? This was a act of courage and I admire you for it. I know what it takes to tell the world your “secrets.” I did it–but did it in a funny way–leaving room for levity is a way to insulate myself from the rawness of the emotional charge that comes with self-disclosure. You were braver than me. You just put it out there. Bravo. And you are not alone. That’s the best news–none of us have to struggle alone. We just have to be brave enough to let others know that we are struggling. 🙂

    1. Lorna, what can I say, thank you just is not enough and seems so weak. But you are true to your word and a very genuine person, your praise will only give me strength, more strength than normal. I am in the middle of doing the second part, and will hope it is seen in the same light… I will say a huge thank you, and you truly honour me.. I am swelling up after reading your reply and trying to reply in turn. Appreciated and so very welcome.. 😉

      1. Carry on, Gerry. What comes from your heart is pure goodness and that is what surely will come from this courageous thing that your are doing: pure goodness.

        All my love and support, Lorna 🙂

  8. Gerry, my asthma came on as an adult. I remember going to the desert on weekends and not being able to breathe. I had no clue that it was asthma. Later when it got really bad I was put on inhalers, prescribed a home nebulizer for the bad days and had a flow meter. I am grateful that changing my diet (massive food allergies) and losing 50lbs helped me. Although there are still a few things out there that can trigger an attack, I do pretty well now… But the diabetes is for the rest of my life. It is difficult for me to admit it, but I do have a terrible time with carb avoidance.

    I am sorry that you are ill, but glad that you have shared. You are not alone in this, and I believe your truthfulness will no doubt help someone else out there.

    1. Hey Lynda thank you for this lovely reply, please read my number 2 one as well, and just about to post my third and final and this touches on diabetes, which was new to me in Jan 2012… All what you say rings bells and memories with me also,,I must admit I have not had a serious attack for a long time,, but I do use my inhalers more some days other than some,, Thank you so much for this, please return and always welcome.. 😉

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