Tuesday 4th February 2014.
I was on the verge of composing and posting some follow-up Xmas posts when my life was abruptly changed, changed for good. But I was stopped in my tracks and had no time to post anything until now. I am hoping all you regular readers will understand and accept. I am truly grateful for the opportunity to continue with living and posting more stories as before. Thank you everyone for your continued support, love and understanding.
Tuesday 17th December 2013. While doing my Xmas posts, I suffered a dull uncomfortable ache in my chest and back of both arms. I could not sleep in bed so spent night o sofa.
Friday 20th December 2013. Visited my doctor, who took blood tests and also had ECG.
Saturday 21st December 2013. 02.00 there were knocks on the door. Where I live one does not open door to unexpected visitations that early in the morning. 10.00am the door went again, doctor visiting. Apparently I had had a minor heart attack on Tuesday and after his initial checks I was rushed to hospital.
Goodbye Universe. [poem]
The universe is no longer my friend
Once again he has let me down
Many years ago he took my father
Followed a few years later with my mother.
Then without a thought he hurt my brother.
Twisting his knife of fate, deeper it went.
Oozing every last drop of emotion from me.
Screwing it up and throwing it away,
Just like scrap paper flying into the bin.
I did for awhile start to believe,
Listening to, and writing all those fancy words.
Telling me about love, faith, fate and hope.
Patience, tolerance, oh never again!
I walked the line, showing I was true.
I have lost faith.
Fate cannot be trusted,
Love will always be with me.
Hope! I do not know if I have any left.
Opening my heart, bearing my soul.
Inviting you in to become my friend.
Friend you proved not to be.
Abandoned me now, so it seems.
Today is the day, I look you in the eye.
For the last time I say, “get out of my life”
Gerry Ainger/Cobb. 23rd December 2013. In hospital Cardiac Care Unit.
Tuesday 24th December 2013. Angiogram-findings not good. Diagnosis, I will not be having stents put in. Instead I am now to have a double heart by-pass. Needless to say I was now very, very scared.
Monday 30th December 2013. Today was my turn, from time of waking in the morning to the time of operation I was continually thinking all sorts of things. Ranging from good thoughts to the real bad negative thoughts. Prolonging my life to never seeing anyone again. With all the pre-med and preparations,with the shaving my body and being drugged. The last I remember was being wheeled into the outer theatre where two surgeons were talking to me and calming me. I do not remember much of the next two days. Apparently the operation was a success.
Wednesday 1st January 2014. My start of the new year was crying in pain, a collapsed lung resulted in drainage tubes and emergency procedures done very early morning of this new years day. For the next two weeks I went through numerous tests and had people, usually nurses, prodding, sticking needles in me, cutting me and sticking tubes in my chest. Cannular’s and drip feeds not to forget the catheter for urine.[Twice]
31 days after my admittance I was allowed to come home, but only with special conditions. Now on this day of posting I have improved well enough to get about and even go out in the car. However there is still a long way to go, at least, I am on this new journey and with new approach to life.
I hope to start my regular posts again shortly, plus an update to this one, I therefore look forward to getting back to normal and appreciate and am grateful for your continued support. Thank you.